Sunday, November 25, 2007

First Frost

I looked in the mirror after washing my hands for dinner at Momo's, ran my fingers through my hair, then stopped, and looked closer. I leaned forward, lifted a hand, and gently sifted a single strand of silver out from the rest of my hair. I called Brooke to come with me into the bathroom light, and looked again, and asked, "Is that really...?"

"A gray hair? Do you have a gray hair?" she asked.

"I think I do!" I replied, and I laughed. I must be the first woman who noticed her first gray hair, and thought about *not* dying her hair any more. I probably will keep it up, because I do like being a red head. But honestly, I remember seeing the strands of silver at Michael's temples, and thinking how pretty they were against the dark of his hair. This one strand on my head shines against the rest and glitters in the light, and for all it might mean in terms of my surrendered youth and the inexorable march of time, it is beautiful to me, and precious in a way I don't really understand.

I laughed, and rushed out to tell my mother, and they probably all think I'm insane. How can I explain to anyone who clings to their own youth as a golden age that my twenties have been the hardest time of my life, and I can only hope to rise out of them into the rest of my life like a phoenix. I know in my soul that I have the strength and grace for this. That in fact this is what I do every day that I get up and greet the world with an open heart full of faith and hope and love. This is what I intend to do all my life, and I hope that life is a long one. Long enough for every hair on my head to turn.

So bring it on, gray hair! I'm ready!

Sunday, November 18, 2007

New blog, new blog, lah lah lah lah laaaaah lah

I have a new blog at

Give me some time, I'll start posting good stuff.

Saturday, November 03, 2007

The List

I haven't ever had this sort of list before, and I didn't really think to sit down to make one, but slowly I've been thinking of things. The world is so big, and I'm so small. This year I'm going to travel, and hopefully see a lot of things I've never seen. Daddy was so alive, and then he was gone. I'm not sure when I'll reach the bottom of my glass, but I hope to drink deep and savor every drop. So here's my list of things I want to do before I die.

  • See the Northern Lights
  • Hear a nightingale
  • See New England in the fall
  • Write a novel
  • See Times Square
  • Visit the Grand Canyon
  • Take the tour at Alcatraz
  • Make a pilgrimage to the Holy Land
  • Visit Gettysburg
  • Go into the catacombs
  • Visit Ellis Island
  • Read every Agatha Christie mystery novel
  • See the Anne Frank house in Amsterdam
  • Eat Chicago deep dish in Chicago
  • Visit the Guggenheim
  • Relax on a black sand beach
  • Stand in the middle of Stonehenge
  • Visit Delphi
  • Drink tea and eat fish and chips in London
  • Ride a paddle boat on the Mississippi
  • See the St. Louis Arch
  • Visit Death Valley
  • See the sun set over the Everglades
  • Sing a solo on stage in Jones Hall (Done)
  • See Paris from the top of the Eiffel Tower (Done)
  • Watch elephant seals on a beach in Big Sur (Done)
  • Play the slots in Vegas (Done)
  • Eat beignets in Cafe du Monde after drinks on Bourbon Street (Done)
  • Pray in St. Peter's Basilica (Done)
  • Listen to blues on Beale Street (Done)
  • Wine tasting in Napa Valley (Done)
  • Watch Old Faithful erupt (Done)
  • Visit the Monterrey Bay Aquarium (Done)

Thankfully I've got some of them out of the way. I hope I have enough time for the rest...